The definition of River Teeth is a memory or an experience that remains in us and is scarred into our minds. No matter what it is, it can be optimistic, Joyful, loving, traumatizing, fearful, emotional, or infuriating. Everyone tends to have a “river tooth” in their past life time, because I know I do. My “river tooth” is very personal and normally I would never say anything about it. But I want the emotions to be genuine and real. Even though the time has passed and has not happened in a while, it is still stuck in the back of my mind.
Making my emotions into a mixed emotion of fear and ntensity. One regular night in the beginning of Summer of 2002, I was around the age of 8, and I was asleep in my bed on the third floor of my house with my sister. My parent’s were asleep in their beds as well, so I thought. Around one o’ clock, all I heard was a lot of arguing going on downstairs. I woke up immediately and crept down the steps to see what was going on. All I heard was yelling and fussing from my mom and dad, I do not remember all of the details but what I do remember I will never forget.
I wanted to go back upstairs and go back to bed but I Just could not ove because I was so scared of what was going to happen next. I sat on the stairs just listening to their conversations and all of the things that they were saying to each other. Then I heard a heavy object break on the marble floor, this shook me up and I finally had the gut to go in and tell them to stop fghting. I remember crying so hard and screaming at my parents for being such bad role models to me and my sister. Their marriage had been nothing but a bumpy road for them, and with constant arguing.
I remember because I was there for the most of these arguments nd fghts as they broke out. They were constantly fighting and throwing things around. Though no one got hurt. Emotionally, everyone was kind of tense and shaken. This caused our family to not speak to each other; we rarely had family dinners during these tough times. It was a very silent family, we talked at times when we had to but my sister and I was to scared to talk to my parents. This made our relationships with our parents difficult to maintain.
Even writing about this experience make my heart ache and brings back so many memories from when I was a kid. I was Just so shocked at my parents response toward their anger. I did not understand how they could get so angry that they felt the need to throw an object to prove the point of how furious they were. This was a very traumatic moment in my life because this was the first time I had witnessed my dad acting in such terrible behavior. I remember I did not talk to them for weeks after the incident. That incident left our relationship on the rocks, because of the tension the fght had brought to our family.
No one talked to each other and it was Just my sister and l. My mom and dad kept apologizing and saying that they would not do it again. Hearing this over and over again, caused me to give up on them. After months and months of silence I finally started seeing my parents change. The big reason why they were “changed” was because they were both saved this year. They were so much more happier than before. I felt like our family went into turmoil, so that it could become as strong as it is today. Some people might not believe in a God, but I do.
My family has gone through such a rough patch in the past, that almost led to a divorce There is a saying in the Bible that God will not let you go through something that you cannot stand. I believe in this one hundred percent, because my family has been through hell and back. I am grateful that I have a great family, and grateful that it is such a strong loving environment now. Having a family that is as caring and as hardworking as mine is such a blessing. But even though they do not argue as much anymore, I still remember those days, as if they have been burned into my brain.
Every time I hear them arguing about dumb issues, I get that tense and my heart tarts racing as if I was living that night all over again. Even the tiniest yelling from my parents Just makes my stomach feel like its churning. My “river tooth” will probably always be with me because kids Just cannot forget those moments in their childhood. It can always fade away, but never forgotten. For me every time I hear my parents arguing I remember how bad the fght can get because my brain triggers the memory and it comes back to my mind. I try to forget those days because things have changed since then, and I am more comfortable with my family.
Being able to get hrough those hard times it has only made them stronger as a couple. Their marriage survived the worst of times, and my dad has been saved and found peace within his heart, and has been so much happier and optimistic since then. My parents get along great these days, and much more happier without the stress and worries. I can forgive but I will never forget. Every one has a river tooth in their life, whether it is a family issue, family death, sexual abuse, or physical abuse. A river tooth does not need to be traumatic all the time, but most of the time it is.
It says that an actual river tooth can kill you, and this is a great metaphor as well because our traumatizing experience can lead to death as well. It might sound a bit morbid, but it is very true. Something so personal that has changed our minds and emotions can change us greatly in our personality, emotions, and mentality. My experience has changed me in many ways, whether it is the way I look at things or the way I treat people. My river tooth was life changing and showed me that I can get through anything, it Just takes time and patience.